Navigating Holiday Stress: Tips for Protecting Your Peace and Reconnecting with Yourself

It’s the start of the holiday season, and if you’re already feeling the weight of it all, you’re not alone. This time of year brings up a lot—connection and celebration for some, dread and tension for others. Whether you’re figuring out how to set boundaries with family, leaning into chosen family, or trying to decide how (or if) to celebrate, one thing is true: navigating the holidays can be tricky.

For some, the holidays are a time of love and connection. For others, they bring uncomfortable conversations, isolation, or just the struggle to make it through. Wherever you find yourself, your way of moving through this season is valid.

If you’re wondering how to handle the tricky dynamics or make decisions about what’s best for you, here are some practical tips to help you protect your peace and reconnect with what you really need.

Holiday Survival Tips for Navigating Tension and Boundaries

1. Tell a Little White Lie
If you’d rather skip family gatherings altogether but don’t feel ready to have a deeper conversation about boundaries, permission granted to use a small excuse. A simple “I’m not feeling well” or “I’ve got work to catch up on” can save you a lot of stress if you’re not up for conflict this year. It’s okay to prioritize your peace.

2. Create an Exit Plan
If you’re attending a gathering and feel uncertain about how long you’ll want to stay, make a plan. Go with a friend, partner, or supportive family member, and agree on a signal or code word to signal it’s time to go. Before leaving, take a moment to place a hand on your heart, take a deep breath, and remind your inner child that you’ve got her/them. Then politely excuse yourself and leave—no detailed explanations needed.

3. Throw a Silent Fit
Can’t leave but feel the frustration building? Sneak off to the bathroom, outside, or to your car. Clench your fists, tighten your body, and silently scream. Your subconscious can’t tell the difference between a real scream and the physical motion of one. You can also press your hands against a wall or grip a steering wheel, towel, or blanket to release pent-up tension.

4. Internal Check-In
Before heading into any gathering (or making decisions), take a moment to check in with your body. Where do you feel tightness, heat, or numbness? Place your hands on those spots and hold, massage, or tap gently. Explore what that tension might be trying to tell you with questions like:

• “What are you afraid of?”

• “What do you need?”

• “What’s stopping you from saying no or setting a boundary?”
  Whatever comes up, offer yourself compassion and support.

5. Be Your Own Protector
Tell the tense part of you how old you are now and remind it that you’ve got this. Choose a small object—a necklace, bracelet, or even a hair tie on your wrist—to act as a talisman. Anytime you touch it, let it remind you that you’re safe and capable of protecting yourself. Afterward, imagine clearing out fear and stress from your body. Use your hands like shovels, “scooping” the tension away, and shake your body for a full minute to release it.

Reconnect to What Matters

Once you’ve checked in and grounded yourself, ask: “What do I really want to do or say?” Trust whatever answer comes. You’re allowed to prioritize your needs, whether that’s setting boundaries, saying no, or fully leaning into the joy of connection.

If it all feels too much, give yourself permission to rest. Even five minutes outside, feeling the air on your skin and reminding yourself that you’re allowed to simply exist, can make a difference.

A Note on Supporting Indigenous-Owned Businesses

If you’re planning on shopping this holiday season, consider supporting Indigenous-owned brands. Here are a few to explore:

• Sequoia Soaps: Sustainable skincare made by Indigenous artisans.

• B.Yellowtail: Native-designed fashion and accessories.

• Ah-Shi Beauty: The first Native-owned luxury beauty brand.

• Eighth Generation: Handcrafted blankets and art.

• Monday May Jewelry: Beautiful handcrafted earrings.

• Sweetgrass Trading Co: A collective of Indigenous brands.

• Manitobah Mukluks: Stunning, handcrafted footwear (better than Uggs!).

A Final Reminder

You don’t owe anyone a perfect holiday.

Boundaries are not only okay—they’re necessary.

Slowing down and protecting your energy is a radical act in a world that wants you to perform.

Take care of yourself this season, and if you’re ready to explore spaces that support your healing, growth, and connection, join my email list here to stay tuned for what’s coming in 2025.